Relationships are never perfect – we all know that. There will always be situations which challenge the both of you to work together in order to find solutions which, in turn, will help your relationship become even stronger. Regardless of that, one of the most difficult parts of a relationship is the back and forth, the hot and cold, which can be called the “yo-yo” effect.

What can you do when your new love interest or partner is red hot one day and then just a few days later won’t give you the time of day? What can you do when it’s obvious both of you feel an intense connection with one another, but nothing is happening? What can you do when there is amazing communication for a long while then all of a sudden silence? These situations can easily cause you to wonder just how solid the relationship is, you begin to panic and you question every action you take. Then you start creating thought patterns that only work to sabotage your mindset and drive your self confidence to new lows. Having a poor mindset, low levels of self esteem, and self sabotaging thoughts are a quick way to bring the relationship to an end all together.

There are always situations where it becomes necessary to turn down a new road, therefore it is also important to remember there are many reasons why this behavior could exist. Here are three of the most common reasons:

External Factors It is very possible that the other person could have a lot going on in their life. Sometimes people prefer to work through their issues alone or aren’t comfortable opening up. This can happen in brand new relationships or even with people who have been together for years. Be mindful of this and don’t try to extract information out of someone if they just don’t want to talk. Let things take their course and keep the conversations enjoyable and lighter. Also, make sure you don’t instantly blame yourself for the change in behavior! Again, those types of thought patterns will sabotage the connection all together.

Fear This is the most common reason for the “yo-yo” type of behavior. If your relationship is new, it’s possible you don’t fully know or understand what this person has experienced in the past. Maybe he or she dealt with some unpleasant situations and is afraid to have that happen again. Perhaps they have gone through one doomed relationship after another and is uncomfortable taking that plunge once again. Don’t add unnecessary pressure in these situations and start demanding more than your potential partner is ready for. Sometimes baby steps lead to the ending you desire most. Take everything one step at a time.

Pressure While maybe this last reason may contradict what was said before, it is important that you give yourself a check as well. Have you been adding unnecessary pressure to the situation? Are you expecting too much too soon? Is your energy tense and stressed over the direction of this relationship? Do you have external factors or fear causing you to be also in a “yo-yo” mode?  If you answered yes to any of these questions, then you may need to spend some time alone in contemplation and meditation and get yourself back into the right frame of mind. Let go for a short while and allow yourself to remove the stress. Get yourself back in the moment and temporarily disconnect if necessary. Find that fun relaxed energy inside of you and start showing that again. While this is easier said than done at times, it can make a remarkable difference.

So if you going through a difficult relationship situation that seems to go up and down like a yo-yo, back and forth, on and off and always runs hot and cold you need to find out what the real truth is, reach out directly to any one of our talented Tarot Readers now. They have the gifts and ability to look deeply into your partner and uncover the motives behind the behavior.

Check in with any of our professional readers at My Tarot Advisor and they will help you out with your relationship questions and concerns.